Justice

[00:00:11] Please note, this podcast contains discussion of murder, crime, and other topics some listeners may find distressing. It may also include adult language, so listener discretion is advised.

[00:00:33] In the Federation, crime is considered illogical, rare, and beneath the ideals of advanced civilization. But in deep space, where warp fields twist reality, and justice is filtered through prime directives and political treaties, murder still finds a way. These are the stories of the Space Crime Continuum.

[00:00:58] I did my homework, I did all the quizzes, I watched a recap of the episode, as you will hear, I have notes. I'm so excited. It's going to be great. I'm convincing you've ever been in your life. It's going to be great. Oh, I love you.

[00:01:20] Also, I have like, I can only record until like 4.10, because I committed myself to seeing Adrienne in the park after this with her child, who we'll have to entertain for a little bit. Anyway, all my energy is for you, though. So. Let's get right into it. If you're looking for a podcast with major technical issues. This is the podcast for you. You know what I actually put?

[00:01:49] My notes for this is, just run an old one like The Simpsons, or just don't do it at all, lol. Lol. Yeah. Well, then you've come to the right place, listeners. This is Space Crime Continuum. And yeah. Anything can happen. Anything can happen. How was my trip, you say? Well, my trip down to the US of A was absolutely fine.

[00:02:12] Going over, we drove through the border between BC and obviously Washington State, for those listening that don't know where the hell we are. And, you know, there's the whole elbows up thing. And we're like, oh, it'll be a real breeze getting through. We get up to the drive to the Peace Arch crossing there. And it was an hour wait, like over an hour wait. But we have Nexus preferred. So it took us like 20 minutes. We roll up.

[00:02:41] And the guy was like, where are you going? We're going to Puyallup for a car show. Bye. He didn't ask how long you stay in. He didn't. He was just like, see ya. We're like, sweet. So we did that. And then the traffic was horrendous. Like getting through Seattle and everything, it took us just over four hours to get to Puyallup. And in context, when we left Sunday morning to go home, it took us two hours to do the same drive. So it was double.

[00:03:11] There was major accidents. It was Friday afternoon. So, of course, it was like peak traffic time. Renton and everywhere was madness. But there was three major accidents, too. So even like Google Maps was showing red. Like there was no options. Ideally, we would like to have taken the Port Angeles Ferry, but we didn't have the Frank. Knock it off. You need to have a bath right now. Fuck sakes. Anyway, let me get down to our hotel. We're staying at a Hampton Inn. Don't be jealous.

[00:03:40] It was pretty much like kitty corner to where the Washington State Fairgrounds are in Puyallup, which is where the Good Guys car show was happening. And we rolled in Friday night and just. Went for dinner in their little downtown, which is very cute. It reminds me kind of like Parksville, like that kind of vibe of like just small little funky shops. Really neat. There was people like cruising, like all the old cars and stuff.

[00:04:04] And then Saturday, I think I got 40,000 steps walking all the show, walking back and forth from the hotel uphill. And it was hot, but like muggy because it kind of was rainy, but it wasn't. And then we went and had bomb ass pizza that night at some little like local place called Wicked Pie. Highly recommend it. And then Sunday morning we got up and we're like, let's get the fuck out of here. And just boom, we had a reservation for the two o'clock ferry.

[00:04:34] Ended up on the 11. Booyah. Awesome. And they have the baseball game on. So watch the Jays on the boat. And I didn't see the end of it. I didn't follow up. So that was, that was the weekend. It was great. Stopped off at a Tarjay briefly. That was it. Like there really wasn't much time for anything else. So I still have not yet been to a Trader Joe's. Trader Joe's. I haven't been. That's all right.

[00:05:04] Yeah. Keep it on the list. It's, it's worth it. Next time. Or like if one day you and I want to go down. I don't know. Anything can happen. Yes. It can. Amazing. Oh my God. Do you have the ability to watch the newest season of Strange New Worlds that's now on TV? I don't think so. If it's on.

[00:05:34] You don't have Paramount? Yeah. Yeah. You don't have Crave? I do have Crave. I wonder if they're showing it on Crave. The first episode was awesome. Oh good. I mean, I still have last season to catch up on. Oh my God. Yeah. Spoiler alert for those listening and for you. It had dinosaurs. That's all I'm going to say. Oh, right on. Cool. Yeah. I mean, who doesn't love dinosaurs? Exactly. Yeah. And I think it's safe to say, what's today?

[00:06:03] Wednesday? This time next week? Yeah. STLV is on, people. It's happening. And we're not going to be there again. But Heather has my list. She's going to get me some autographs from people from Deep Space Nine, like Mr. Casey Biggs. And the guy, Max, I can't pronounce his last name. He played Rom, the Klingon, the Ferengi. Nice. Nice. Maybe another one or two.

[00:06:32] I can't remember what I asked for, but I said, just let me know. Terry Farrell, Dax. Oh, we're done. You know, people that are really easy that are at their tables the whole time. It's not like a lineup. They have the 8x10s ready. It's cash. Like, just you don't have to think about how much should I pay for a separate 8x10. And then I have to have a ticket to get in line. There's service charges and all that. Well, I'm like, you're on your vacation, girl. You don't need to be lined up for you. I'm not going to ask you to get like Paul Giamatti for me. Okay? He's going to have a massive lineup. Like, I'm not an asshole.

[00:07:01] So I just get a couple of fun ones, you know, people that I won't be super bummed if I didn't get to talk to them personally. Like, I've already gotten Terry's autograph and had a moment with her anyways. And I'll reserve like the Dr. Bashir and Nana's for like another time when I'm there. Yeah. Riker. I want to get Jonathan Frakes' autograph. I want to have a moment. I know. You should be like, here's the cameo from... Oh my God.

[00:07:30] My 40th birthday. Yes. Mask up. God, that was a thing. That was a time. That was a time. And then he was like, maybe next... And you'll have a huge celebration next year. And like the pandemic is even worse. It's not worse. Jonathan Frakes, what the hell you said? I know.

[00:07:53] I got a Star Trek The Experience t-shirt on eBay. It's like a double XL. It's just in the wash right now. It was like 12 bucks. And I was like, I gotta have it. So I'm very excited. And then I bought a bunch of Star Trek TNG novels that showed up for... So I can take them to the next show. Like the show we're doing in a few weeks. Yeah. That'll be fun. Hop that Trek stuff. Maybe I should wear my new jacket.

[00:08:23] Oh, not for sale. Not for sale. No. No. You can rent it for $3,000. Rent a swag. Rent a swag. Yeah. Or for 20 bucks, you can take a picture of me wearing it. Oh my God. You don't know me, but you want a photo of this jacket. And that's going to cost you. I just saw a picture of the jacket because I was looking through photos that you had sent me for some reason. I was trying to find something. Anyway.

[00:08:51] And like the jacket is so spectacular and it's in such good shape. Like I'm so glad. Yeah. It's gold. It's just it. Yeah. It's all the colors. Came with the bag, like the zip up. Like this was like considered the creme de la creme of the Star Trek experience clothing line when it came out. It was well looked after, which is really important.

[00:09:18] Except that the person that wrote on the note, like said something about, sorry, I didn't get it steamed or something. Or sorry if it's musty. It's been in storage since I had COVID or something. We're like, is this infected? Oh my God. It was too funny. We were laughing. Yeah. Like you don't have to say that much information anymore. You don't need to. Just give me my card. Yeah. And it was free. Yeah. So wonderful. Great. I love it. Anyway. Let's get to it.

[00:09:48] We're on a tight timeline here. And if we run out of time here, I'll call you back. First off. We need to come to fansets first. Fansets. Roll it. Hello, listeners and friends. We'd like to take a hot minute to thank our friends at Fansets. As you may or may not know, they are an incredible team of Trek fans that make and sell really cool pins.

[00:10:12] If you go over to the website, fansets.com, I know you won't be disappointed in what you see. They have pins that span the whole Trek universe and are constantly releasing new pins all the time. So head on over to fansets.com. Have a look around. And don't forget, if you want to save yourself a couple of bucks, use our special code at checkout, which is TREKGEKS. All caps. One word. And you'll get 10% off your order.

[00:10:39] And for those of you in the U.S. of A., spend over $30 and you will get free shipping. Fansets. Our pins have character. And that's fansets. Thank you, fansets. Their pins have character. You know. What? They have character. They're going to be at STLV next week. You know. Go find their booth. Say hi to Bill and Dan. That'll be next to them.

[00:11:05] If you're going to the Fan Geeks party, you get a cool Ben set pin that's like a Star Trek slash Vegas theme. I think it's like a arcade because it's a barcade they're doing it. Super rad. So, yeah. Check them out. Nice. I love it. Did we do a special Haley-centric episode today? We did. I appreciate it so much. And this is how you get me to do my homework. Just make it about Wesley.

[00:11:33] Make it all about Wesley. ABC. Always be chatting about Wesley. Anyway. So, okay. I'll go through. So, this is the episode Justice. Just Us. We also covered this in an episode of Rewind. I don't know which episode. It doesn't matter. I didn't listen to it, but maybe I will. Later. So, I thought this was... I'm just going to read my notes. So, I thought this was the episode where Wesley and his friend steal a shuttle.

[00:12:04] But, you know the one I'm talking about, right? Like, where he kind of... Yeah. First duty? And it was like... Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Because we also covered that one. Then it was like, no, it's a season one episode. And I have, like, season one trauma. Because, like, season one is, like, not the greatest. Right? Like, they're still learning their characters. That it's not... Well, and this episode is in it. But I was pleasantly surprised. And so were my eyes to see that it was the pervert planet.

[00:12:31] And I watched a recap, which I had to watch instead of the whole episode. Because I could not find it anywhere. Not even to buy on its own without buying a whole fucking prescription. Whole subscription to Paramount+. And then I wrote, more like Paramount, fuck you. Good one. I was angry.

[00:12:54] Anyway, as I said, I was very pleased to see that this is the one with the planet full of good-looking but racist and pretty weird aliens. Or were they humans who moved there? I can't remember. Either way, I'm always down for a Risa-like planet where people are gallivanting around all scantily clad. Cool place. Or, as Worf would say, next planet. Meanwhile, I'm like, how'd they get this footage of my 14th birthday?

[00:13:21] Also, that joke has not aged well. No pun intended. And because I have aged very well. Thank you. Even my doctor said that to me today. Not in those words. I know. But obviously, it's a fake reference. I don't actually remember my 14th birthday. So, but you know what I mean. I feel bad writing the joke these days. So, this recap I watched was from a channel called Reverse Angle. Which is these two dudes. Nick and Robert. Or Bobbert.

[00:13:50] As I hope he sometimes calls himself. Like, have you heard of these guys? No. Have you? Okay. We need to have them on this podcast. They are like us, but dudes. So, basically like Bill and Dan. But anyway, their best quotes for me include, live in paradise, except we are the worst. Everything in this episode they do poorly. The aliens named the Edo are stupid.

[00:14:18] Everything that happens is dumb. They violate the prime directive and leave with Wesley. So, I had one question. What is their skin cancer rate? Because those clothes are doing nothing. And they're so tanned. And I mean, I'm just jealous. But still. And also, John had one question. Which was, who knit Wesley's sweater? And I was like waiting for the punchline. But he just liked the sweater. Like a brown sweater with like a little sort of like a faux. Turtle neck. Turtle neck. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:14:48] So, my thoughts on the episode. Well, I haven't really recapped the episode at all. But like Wesley accidentally falls into some protected. And by protected, I mean with like a gauze sheet. Flora or flowers. And he gets like disproportionately punished for it. This episode messes me up. Because if there's one thing I know about myself. Is that I follow the rules. And I think that if you break the rules, you should be punished. Like I don't jaywalk. I don't murder people. And I don't steal bread from the store.

[00:15:18] Even though this was about rules. And breaking rules is the worst. This was, this is excessive. You get executed for breaking any law at any time. And at any degree. Like I didn't like this particular rule about the flowers. And it was unfair for Wesley to be punished. When they did a bad job at protecting the flowers. Like if everyone is running around. People will run into things. Also, the crew broke like the one rule. To rule them all. Which is the prime directive. Like, huh? Huh?

[00:15:48] You can't just do that. Anyway. While we're talking about. What did I say? Don't steal bread. I also wanted to go on a tangent. I have a board here. I'll take off my background. How do I do that? Freaking Zoom. Doesn't matter. I'm not a cat. I don't know how to turn this off. But I, for fun. I like tried to write with my left hand. And just, yeah.

[00:16:18] And just if you, if you ever need someone to write like a threatening, scary letter for you. Like chiller font. It's me. I'm going to try and show you this. Will it work? Will it work? No. I'll take a picture of it. Yeah. Take a picture of it. But so anyway, Wesley episode, but like I wasn't able to see it from front to back, as they say.

[00:16:46] Though I could have just borrowed the DVDs from my parents. They have like the DVDs of season one. Which I bought them for $150. Oh yeah. And I just got it at the spot for five bucks or whatever. Yeah. Believe it. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Yeah. You almost had it right too. It shows that you didn't watch it. So no.

[00:17:08] No, I will just, I will just clarify that the, the planet is even dumber than you were describing because the, the no go zone wasn't that they were just trying to protect the flowers. The shtick with this dumb ass backwards planet is that they randomly choose spots that are considered no go zones.

[00:17:30] So there's no way in hell welcomed newcomers would know that and understand the fact that it's punishable by death if you break the law. So you can't even be like, you could even accidentally break a rule for somebody who's a rule follower because you wouldn't know what the rules are because every day there's just a new random pop up with the little, like backyard playground, like backyard playground, little farm fence around it.

[00:17:59] And you're supposed to assume, okay, if you step into there, you die. And it could be flowers. It could be a random square of grass or someone's, it could be anywhere. And all of them know. It's not fair. No. Yeah. It's ridiculous. That is dumb. That is dumb. And you know, like how hard like alluded to it to like, hope it's not too good to be like, yeah, like it is. Their rules went from dumb to dumb and dumber. Like the movie. Right. Yeah.

[00:18:29] That's such a good movie. It still holds up. It does. Oh, so brilliant. It's yeah. It's not the worst season one episode. It's not the best season one episode. I mean, I, I enjoy the, the innuendo and the smirking behind it, especially because when I watched as a kid, I didn't really get, you know, I wasn't really catching on to what was going on. It's campy nineties, man.

[00:18:59] It's just, it's stuck in its decade and it shows and you got to love it. Pretty to look at. Pretty to look at. Like I enjoyed. Yeah. I like those. Like I said, like, I like those vacation planets. I like those planets that are nice and pretty and to have pretty people on that. And I was, was like, I want to go there. Totally. And there wasn't really a lot available for like goofs and trivia because I seem to have not even filled in that page on the Trello board. Oh, fair enough. I mean, it's,

[00:19:29] I think there's like where it was filmed. It was filmed at this university or something like everyone. So. Yeah. Yeah. But I don't know if you read my true crime thing that I have to match up with this. Okay. Cause this is like, this is a good one.

[00:19:52] And this is a story that is so sad and so heartbreaking and you might know it. Uh, let me ask you if you recognize this name. Otto Warmbier. No. Okay. Let me tell you this story. Cause what we're looking at as a comparison is injustice.

[00:20:22] Wesley committed or accidentally committed a petty, stupid, insignificant crime that could have been punishable the worst way possible. Right? Yes. Okay. So I got this from the untold story of auto warm beer, American hostage by Doug Bach Clark. Otto warm beer was a bright all American 20 year old, 21 year old university of Virginia student.

[00:20:50] He was top student athlete, prom King and aspiring banker who went on a budget new year's Eve tour to North Korea in late 2015, looking for adventure before becoming a finance intern for a finance internship was going to start. began as a quirky tourist trip, turning into a nightmare when he was arrested at the airport for allegedly trying to steal a propaganda poster from his hotel. North Korea forced a public confession,

[00:21:19] sentenced him to 15 years of hard labor and held him for over a year. He was returned to the U S in June, 2017 with severe brain damage and died days later at age 22. I remember that. Yeah. So this became a big political flashpoint. His family and the Trump administration highlighted it as evidence of North Korean brutality and torture, using it to ramp up pressure on the regime, even as it edged the U S closer to conflict.

[00:21:49] Based on extensive reporting, there was like a way more complex story happening here. There was no clear medical evidence of physical beatings or torture. It was likely that he was kept in relatively good physical condition as North Korea often did with foreign detainees for leverage. But endured intense psychological pressure. The exact cause of his brain damage remains unknown, though. The article explores possibilities like a medical event or even a suicide attempt after his harsh sentencing.

[00:22:17] His story was shaped by competing narratives from North Korea, the U S government and his grieving family. So a couple of key events in the timeline is late December, 2015. joins the young pioneer tours, joins the young pioneer tours to North Korea, meets a group in Beijing and flies to Pyongyang. The tour includes propaganda sites, drinking and new year celebrations. And then there's about a two hour unaccounted window on new year's Eve at the

[00:22:47] hotel. On January 2nd, on January 2nd, he is detained at Pyongyang airport. As the group prepares to leave North Korea accuses him of stealing a propaganda poster from a restricted hotel area as an anti-regime act, possibly on behalf of the church, secret society, and the U S government per his later forced confession. Like imagine you're on this tour with him and you're all like boarding in gate four for your trip back to Denver.

[00:23:16] And one of the people is like being pulled aside, yelled at in a language they don't speak and just taken away. Like, what would you do? What if it was you and me like leaving even like Las Vegas, like, and who knows what could happen this day and age with just the way political politics are like, what would you do? Like, I mean, that's, I wouldn't want to like, if it, like realistically, like I wouldn't want to leave you. Um, the, yeah,

[00:23:46] like I just, I don't like, I wouldn't want to be detained either, but I also wouldn't want to leave you alone. And I, I would want to go home because I would want to be safe, but I don't think that I would be able to leave you. Cause you would be killed. Like broken down palace much. Like what? Like, yeah, especially if you know, for a fact, it's like a miscommunication and like, I know she didn't steal anything because one, that's not her style. She's way got better style than that. Or she's way tackier than that. But like,

[00:24:16] it's, yeah, it's just, it's scary because you think about some of the stories that you're hearing in the news about ice agents, like just taking people and disappearing with them. And the families are left just like, like, I don't even know who to call. Like, I don't even know who to phone. Like you have to know somebody on the inside and the inside to be able to get any information, which is just not, not okay. This day and age. Anyway. So, so yeah, he's taken away from the airport.

[00:24:45] And then like a few weeks or months, it's not really true. He's obviously held probably in a guest house run by a state security undergoes intense interrogations, like up to 15 hours a day, kept isolated with no family contact and fed propaganda. There's no confirmed physical torture in other issues. So they don't really know if that's what happened, but in March, he appears in a forced public confession,

[00:25:14] tearful reading from notes and a sentence to 15 years, hard labor. After a short trial, the video shows him looking physically intact, but emotionally broken shortly after sentencing, according to North Korean doctors, autos brought unconscious to friendship hospital in the morning after the trial suffered severe brain damage. Both sides of the brain affected consistent with oxygen deprivation. He's resuscitated, ventilated and cared for there for over a year.

[00:25:42] He remains in a state of unresponsive wakefulness 2016 or to early 2017 back channel diplomacy and official U S efforts tried to secure his release. North Korea uses him as leverage. And this was under Obama to start. And then under the Trump administration in June, 2017 U S officials negotiate his release. A medical team flies in auto is handed over unconscious returns home to

[00:26:11] Cincinnati on a medical flight upon return. His family sees him in terrible condition, jerking, howling, deformed limbs, a feeding tube, a shaved head never regains awareness. There's no evidence of physical torture. No fractures, no matching scars from beatings. Teeth are naturally in good repair, but dies six days after return after the life support is removed. Um, the warm beer is publicly accused North Korea of torture.

[00:26:38] Trump officials amplify the narrative of brutal beatings. This fuels maximum pressure sanctions and talk of war. And the coroner's findings contradict some of the torture claims later on. And just, just messy with no real information, but like, yeah, like he, like a couple of days after the trial, like he's in the hospital and no one ever told the family that for a year, he was like unresponsive with multiple, like severe brain damage.

[00:27:05] Just like all because he maybe stole a poster off the wall in the hotel. I mean, take this with a grain of salt. This is from a Reddit thread about it, but someone who said, um, just on the thread, like thoughts on his case. And this person goes really sad case. I stayed at the same hotel and we were sold posters. I'm not sure if that still happens. That was four years ago. Also like, sorry,

[00:27:33] what are people doing going to North Korea? Like I'm also interested in North Korea, but I would never go there. I know there's, yeah, there's, there's certain places under circumstances. I'm like, I would love to go if I wasn't a woman. Like I know somebody who's planning a trip to go to Jordan. I've heard really beautiful things about Jordan, but given that there's like, Oh, I lost you. Oh, it's just the Sarah show now. Okay.

[00:28:04] I was like, is she offended that I said I would go to Jordan under certain circumstances? I'm out. That was it. I still had 10 minutes on my side. I don't know. Yeah. Me too. But my, yeah, it just said upgrade. Now you're meeting Melinda in 10 minutes. Otherwise. And I was like, Zoom's in his luteal phase too. Apparently. Just not the, like really room zoom. Right. Like, go fuck yourself. Anyway. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah,

[00:28:32] it's a brutal story and it's really sad and it's just, it's just scary. And it's, it, I thought it fit really well with this episode because it's. Yeah. Well, and he didn't have captain Picard to come in, save him and violate the crime directive. Take him away. Captain Picard for president. Yeah. That'd be bad. The most British Frenchman in the galaxy.

[00:29:00] That's another one from that reverse angle. Those guys are funny. I'm going to, is that a podcast or is it a YouTube show or the YouTube? I think it's, it's, it might be both, but it, I think it's YouTube based. Cause they have like clips of the show that they, that they, what's it called again? Reverse angle. Oh, I wish my dog's ass had a reverse angle right now. Cause someone just dropped a bomb. That is not good. Gross. Yeah.

[00:29:29] Movie and TV show discussion and review, but it's really heavy on TNG. Well, everything is also beyond TNG. Like it looks like they did a three part review on first contact. Whoa. I like that. Pretty active. Like. Yeah. Reverse angle. Yeah. And then, yeah, I was like, have you heard of the, these guys and, and,

[00:29:59] or have we actually engaged with them before? Cause I don't remember my own life, but you think no. We did some quizzes. Yeah. I use chat GPT to generate. I wrote mine down. I wrote amazing. I'm going to read out the first one. And that way anybody listening can also do the quiz. So I'll read the first one. So the first one was just automatically generated by AI, but the second one, I prompted it,

[00:30:29] giving it specific answers that it would have to work around. And same with the third one. I wanted it to include some funny suggestions instead of just trying to be like serious or like, you know, more sensible. So the first one is, um, obviously which Star Trek husband is destined for you. So sorry, male listeners. Next time I will do one for your Star Trek wife, because I would also like to know who my Star Trek wife would be. Um,

[00:30:59] so. Play. Oh, wow. I was, I. Not. I'll just stop there. I just. I would probably be like a hundred percent seven of nine. Well, yeah, but also I'm not opposed to. Janeway, Kira, Dax. If you say Kes. Oh, God. No.

[00:31:29] God. Horrible. Um, Raffi. Yeah. I bet we'd have a good time. I'd be a really bad influence. Oh, you don't want to drink alcohol. Oh, no, this isn't gonna. Okay. Yeah. Oh, so you're trying to be better. Oh, better. Oh yeah. You're looking for redemption in life. Okay. Yeah, no, I'm just on a straight highway to hell anyway.

[00:32:00] Husband. So the, the whole, the, if you're playing along folks, there's 10 questions and it was going to be like, ABC, D E to choose from. And so tally up and whatever letter you have the most of is going to be the, the winner. So for number one, your ideal date night is a candle at dinner where we discuss philosophy and emotions for six hours. B fighting space pirates, then grabbing tacos.

[00:32:26] C reading quietly in the same room without talking D winning at poker while lovingly roasting each other or E building something together that may or may not explode. Ooh, fun. Your biggest green flag is a emotional intelligence. B confidence. C reliability.

[00:32:51] D a great sense of humor or E competence bordering on wizardry. An alien threatens earth. U a negotiate. B punch it. C make a detailed contingency plan. D bluff until someone smarter arrives or E reverse the polarity. Your love language is a deep conversations. B acts of service. C quiet loyalty.

[00:33:21] D constant teasing or E fixing your wifi without being asked. That doesn't apply in the future. Which pet would you adopt? A a very judgmental cat. B a giant dog. C something that requires spreadsheets to care for. D a mischievous ferret. Or E whatever glowing creature everyone says is dangerous. Because you're a badass. Next question.

[00:33:49] Your apartment is A cozy with books everywhere. B somehow both messy and functional. C immaculate. D decorated almost entirely with inside jokes. And E filled with gadgets you built yourself. Next. Pick a vacation. A ancient ruins. B backpacking somewhere wild. C a quiet cabin. D Las Vegas and space.

[00:34:19] Or E a science museum the size of a planet. Okay your biggest flaw. A I overthink. B I leap before looking. C I bottle everything up. D I make jokes at the worst possible moments. Or E I accidentally create problems while trying to solve other problems. Okay I have all of those. Someone insults your best friend. Right? Oh god. Someone insults your best friend.

[00:34:49] A deliver a devastatingly polite speech. B choose violence. C calmly destroy them with facts. D publicly embarrass them with humor. Or E hack their toaster. And lastly. Which drink sounds best? A. T. B. Whiskey. C. Coffee. D. Romulan ale. Probably illegal. Or E. Whatever the engineer invented five minutes ago. Well.

[00:35:18] If you had mostly A. Your Star Trek husband is Spock. B. James T. Kirk. C. Data. D. William Riker. Or E. Jordi LaForge. What did you get? I got B. You got B. James T. Kirk. Congratulations. You now co-parent a starship. He falls in love every other Tuesday. But somehow keeps coming home to you.

[00:35:48] Life is chaotic. Adventurous. And approximately 63% rule breaking. Expect. Last minute vacations. Hero complexes. Ridiculous confidence. Flowers after every near death experience. 63% rule breaking. Like did. Did we not just discuss this? What did you get? I got William Riker. Your life is basically a romantic comedy. He flirts with everyone but worships you. He sits in chairs incorrectly.

[00:36:16] Plays jazz at inappropriate times. And somehow makes every diplomatic incident more entertaining. Benefits include excellent cooking. Beard appreciation. Endless confidence. And dancing in the kitchen. None of those sound like Riker. I'm sorry. Yeah. That's true. Dancing in the kitchen. Just focus on the pizza. Because last I heard you don't do it very well. What? Oh my God. Am I right? Right? All right. Quiz number two was the same idea. Not going to read it all out.

[00:36:45] But I would like to know what your answer was. I had. Okay. So I had a tie. I, um. Ooh. Did you do the tiebreaker question at the end? No. I didn't. No. Because I didn't read how to actually. So here we go. Want me to give you that tiebreaker one? Well, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Give it to me. The bonus question is. You're trapped in a turbo lift for six hours. What do you secretly hope happens? A. It becomes the most flirtatious six hours of your life.

[00:37:14] B. He reveals he orchestrated the whole thing. C. You somehow leave with a profitable business partnership. D. You spend six hours laughing and talking about life. Or E. Four hours of silence followed by one incredibly meaningful sentence. A. Which means my final answer is A. William Riker. Congratulations.

[00:37:43] You married the galaxy's smoothest flirt. He's confident enough to charm an entire room. But somehow always makes you feel like the only person there. Every date becomes an adventure. Every dance ends with laughter. And every chair is sat on in the weirdest possible way. Relationship difficulty on a scale of five? Three. Fun level. Five out of five. Nice. True. Nice. You? I was down to almost a tie.

[00:38:08] And then lastly, Chief Miles O'Brien won out over Quark. I have exquisite taste. Why wouldn't Quark be in there? He'd be a blast. You have exquisite taste. Nobody loves harder than a tired engineer who survived 17 impossible disasters and still comes home wanting to make dinner with you. He's practical, loyal, funny, and somehow makes fixing the dishwasher ridiculously attractive. The relationship difficulty on a scale of one to five is a one.

[00:38:38] Green flag level, maximum. Quark would have been a four out of five for relationship difficulty. I mean, he flirts. He's hilarious. He owns a bar. I mean, I could relate to that. I could have fun with that. We could be very profitable together. And the last quiz was finding out what our jobs would be on a Starfleet ship. What did you get?

[00:39:05] Science officer, which is what I have always chosen and was kind of, I picked, like I could tell if there's a theme. Yeah. Oh, mostly B. Science officer. Yeah, mostly B. Browser history is 98%. What if? You'd happily spend eight hours studying an alien rock if there were even a 2% chance it rewrites everything we know about physics. Crew opinion. They're a genius. Please make them stop explaining quantum fungi. Yeah, no, it's true.

[00:39:32] I think I was, I had to do the last minute tiebreaker. Tiebreaker. Because I was between C and D. A chief engineer or a holodeck safety inspector. And I ended up getting chief engineer. I possessed the sacred Starfleet ability to fix impossible problems by talking to machines. Your natural habitat is inside a Jeffrey's tube, covered in coolant, muttering, who designed this thing? The warp core fears you. That's great. It's, it's, it is what it is.

[00:40:01] It's not, I don't think it's going to happen. I think I'm at 46. It's not really time for me to change my career into becoming an engineer for Starfleet. It's a whole different skill set. Well, it's maybe not. I mean, it's suggesting that you have to. What if you need a bottle? You know, let's try a year of that life. Me and Chief O'Brien, my husband. We can be a tag team and we'll just fix everything. So fun. So fun. Our dishwasher is broken right now. So that would be great if we could. I know. Terrible. Okay.

[00:40:31] So we've done the Trek. We've done the true crime. We've done the fun quizzes. Have you seen anything outside of the Trek realm? Any, watching any new shows? See any good movies? What have you got for the listeners? We're dying to know. Project Hail Mary. Okay. With Brian Gosling? Yes. Okay. Was it good? Yeah. I mean, I enjoyed it. Hear me out. Watched it on the Luteal phase.

[00:41:00] So I cried. I cried through like the whole thing, basically. Awesome. Yeah. That must have been fun for John. Yeah. It is fun because he adds things to the list. Because I cry about ridiculous things. Other than that, we're really enjoying Parks and Rec. It's new to me. And yeah, we're in season six. Anne is quite literally about to have a baby.

[00:41:30] And Perkins. And Perkins. And yeah, it's just, it's so enjoyable. Um, yeah. It's such a great show. I love it. I love that. I love that. We just finished Brooklyn Nine-Nine as our TV rewatch comedy. What do we have on when we're eating dinner? And because we finished that, we have now started from the beginning. And we've never seen it all the way through is Arrested Development.

[00:42:01] Yeah. There's always money in the banana stand. Um, and in the evenings, we were, we just finished the newest season. Don't quote me on this. Was it season two or three of Shrinking with Harrison Ford and, uh, et al. Wonderful show. And now we are watching season two of Your Friends and Neighbors with Jon Hamm. Um, Jon Hamm. Very good. I liked the first season.

[00:42:30] I'm liking the second season. And now I am eagerly awaiting Ted Lasso. New season comes out August like second or third. And the newest season of Lioness. And I cannot stop thinking about the show, talking about the show. I want to rewatch it from the start. Zoe Zeldana, badass, always. And Yuhura from Star Trek movies. Um, Nicole Kidman, Morgan Freeman, LaMonica Garrett.

[00:42:59] By the people who did Yellowstone. Badass women. So good. So exciting. Can't wait for season three. That's my story. Yeah. That's all I got. Me too. Guess that means it's closing time. I was thinking for our next episode, we haven't touched on Voyager yet. And I did a little bit of deep diving to do some research. And there's an episode. And cause I, you can disagree. You know, if you don't like it, throw it right back at me.

[00:43:29] But the episode we did previous to this one, where we started talking about like, um, the, the Miles O'Brien one, it was kind of prison-y. And like, this is one where Paris and Kim are end up in a prison. It's called The Shoot. And so I don't remember the episode at all. It's definitely a prison-y war. And I like talking about prisons, um, because it makes me think of Oz. And then it makes me think of J.K. Simmons and Chris Maloney. And Con Air, which is, I should watch Con Air again sometime soon. I love that movie.

[00:43:58] And Miles O'Brien's in it. Chief O'Brien. He's in Con Air. Oh, yes. I'm putting on Con Air tonight, I think. Do it. Gotta happen. Yeah. I love that. Okay. So let's do the shoot next. Um, this episode, I have to edit it by Saturday morning at 9 a.m. To get it to Bill, to get it to go out on Tuesday, because they'll be heading off to Star Trek Las Vegas. And they need to get it in the, I know, they're so lucky. I'm so jealous.

[00:44:28] I looked today at Price's last minute for Vegas. And it's like skyrocketed, of course, because it's last minute. I was like, even if I don't go to the convention, I just go to Vegas and just hang out like a weirdo in the corner eating chicken nuggets and staring at everybody. It's Wednesday. Maybe I should buy a lottery ticket. Maybe I'll win a lottery ticket tonight. If I win more than $20,000, I will buy us last minute tickets to Vegas. Yeah, that sounds good. Thank you for being here.

[00:44:57] Did I do good? You did great. I think we turned that front one upside down. Man, oh man, it's time limited. The worst. Yeah. Money please. It's so good. Oh, it's so good. They're great. I love it. I got to pee. Me too. All right. Love you. Love ya. To infinity and beyond.

[00:45:30] Where did this grass come from? Get it? Because, like, no one else can see it. But it's like, honey, I shrug the kid's grass. Sure. Anyway. Yeah. Bye, girl. Well, folks, that's it. Case closed. Mystery solved. And we're filing this one under S for Starfleet. A big thanks to Bill and Dan for giving us a space on the Trek Geeks podcast network.

[00:45:56] Be sure to check out the other amazing shows on the network, like Sci-Fi Sisters, the Big Sci-Fi Podcast, or even those terrible old episodes of Rewind. Don't say we didn't warn you. Head over to trekgeeks.com. You'll find links to all of our social media there. And if you're feeling really generous, consider joining Patreon to support the Trek Geeks network. Subscriptions start at just $3 a month. Huge thanks to our friends at Fansets for their support. Stay tuned. We'll have another episode coming at you real soon.

[00:46:25] Also, we'd love to hear from you. So leave us a voicemail on the Trek Geeks website. Do it. We'll never forget it. It's our favorite thing. And with that, as I like to say, we'll boldly go. You know the rest. That's good. Space Crime Continuum is a production of Trek Geeks, executive producers Bill Smith and Dan Davidson.

[00:46:55] For more great Star Trek podcasts, discover the other shows of Trek Geeks available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or on trekgeeks.com.